Nigerians are widely known for being very opinionated people. We have strong opinions and are generally not shy to express our feelings. As a result, especially to those who are not familiar with our culture, we can sometimes come across as loud or brash.
However, a lesson in temperance would be of immense benefit to our overall image as Nigerians.
“And to knowledge temperance; and to temperance patience; and to patience godliness” — 2 Peter 1:6
Please, don’t get me wrong: I admire the temperament and passion of Nigerians. Nevertheless, to become the best versions of ourselves, it would benefit us to ask the question: Could I be wrong?
Unlike the more reserved nature often seen in average Europeans, such as their timidness, shyness, and hesitancy, Nigerians, by contrast, often possess the opposite traits—boldness and decisiveness.
While there are positives and negatives in both categories of character traits, wisdom tells us that we must examine ourselves to identify where our weaknesses lie so we can adjust, reconstruct, and recondition our character for greater productivity.
One significant area where we Nigerians need to work on is in our assumptions and responses.
Most of the time, a typical Nigerian will assume they are right without verifying the facts. We tend to rely on our convictions, often disregarding facts, statistics, details, and standards. When anyone tries to challenge or oppose our views, we fortify our opinions with an avalanche of emotions, zeal, and passion—all of which we possess in abundance.
You’ve probably witnessed a situation where two taxi drivers in traffic step out of their cars and attempt to prove their points with their fists rather than with reasoning.
We need to take to heart the words of Robert Greene: “Tolerance is giving to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself.”
Could I be wrong? The benefits of this question is enormous:
It gives you a space to have a second thought
It allows you to look for more arguments
It gives you time to separate between your emotions and facts
It provides you an avenue to give your opponent the benefit of the doubt.
It allows you to see your imperfections and fallibility
It saves you from assertiveness and presumptions
It delivers you from illusions and self-deceptions
It motivates you to research
It allows you to hear the opponent’s opinions and views.
It allows you to take note of your blind spots (those things you are not seeing)
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law” Gal – 5:22-23.
The only basis for response and action should be truth or facts. Emotions, assertions, or assumptions are not enough justification for any decision.
The most easily recognisable scenario involving our national or state assembly, to the average Nigerian, is when honourable members exchange blows or throw objects at one another.
If members of the national assembly could reflect and ask themselves the critical question, “Could I be wrong?”, perhaps there would be greater serenity in our political landscape.
Benefit of a doubt: It is when we regard someone as innocent until proven otherwise, leaning toward a favourable view of someone. This principle applies when we are uncertain about something, where there is no proof, facts, figures, or statistics to support our argument. In such cases, it is better not to blame, accuse, or judge. Instead, we should lean towards a more favourable judgment in favour of the opposite side.
For Nigeria to be great, we must adopt this principle in our judicial system and daily interactions. The absence of this fundamental value in human relationships often leads to suspicion of one another. I can only imagine how Nigeria would change for the better if this principle were taught from primary to tertiary institutions. If this singular principle became part of our value system and mindset, it could help reduce societal ills like violence, Boko Haram, militancy, armed robbery, kidnapping, and more.
This lack of trust is the reason behind the mutual suspicions between the North, East, and West. We hardly give others the benefit of the doubt, assuming their actions lack good intentions. I have heard Southerners say, “Northerners want to rule Nigeria as their birthright.” That is prejudice! If it were true, they would not have voted for President Obasanjo for two terms or voted for President Jonathan in 2011. Could I be wrong in my assumptions about other Nigerians?
While growing up in the Western part of Nigeria, I heard that Northerners speak English poorly (referring to their accent) until I travelled abroad and discovered that nearly all Nigerians speak English poorly.
A similar example that comes to mind is a popular phrase in the Southern part of Nigeria: “The North is the problem of Nigeria; they have taken all our wealth.” I had no way to prove or disprove this until I travelled to the North for the first time and discovered that the standard of living there was much lower than in the South. Northerners are less privileged in many areas compared to what I’ve witnessed in the South. The devastation I saw in the North almost made me weep.
“If we could look into each other’s hearts and understand the unique challenges each of us faces, I think we would treat each other much more gently, with more love, patience, tolerance, and care.” – Marvin J. Ashton
Yes, I know that Northerners have ruled the nation more than Southerners, but the problem of Nigeria is much more complicated than that. We would do ourselves a lot of good if we could be less judgmental in our assumptions about each other.
Ei incumbit probatio qui dicit, non-qui negat is a Latin expression meaning that one is considered innocent until proven guilty. This principle of presumption of innocence is widely used in the judiciary, and it is a powerful value. Any society that wishes to build a prosperous and civilized nation must adopt it. We must intentionally prioritise the value of “presumption of innocence” in our daily dealings.
“Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts.” – Aristotle
Innocent until proven guilty is one of the most sacred principles of the American criminal justice system, asserting that a defendant is innocent until proven guilty. In other words, the prosecution must prove each essential element of the criminal charges beyond any reasonable doubt.
When it comes to how these principles could help us build a better nation, we must always remember that we can only speak the truth when it is established or when facts support our arguments. Otherwise, we should intentionally refrain from any form of condemnation, judgment, or castigation.
- For the love of god, church, and nation, Adelaja, a Nigerian-born journalist, writes from Brussels, Belgium.